Along For the Ride

Hi. It's me again. Today is a ta'anit (fast day). Yet another time to reflect. So I was thinking about how two weeks ago I was ready to give up. I wasn't understanding the mishnah/gamora like I wanted. I felt like a kindergartner in a physics class. So the week after that I became determined to really challenge myself. I had to change my attitude. You see, in the states the schools are set up where you receive information and you spit it back out and in a few days you have a quiz on it. There really isn't a why and how. In yeshiva we are given just a few statements and then told to figure out what is going on. What the speaker is thinking, why the gamora stated things they way it did, why the use of a certain lashon (language - the words a person choses to use are just as important). Anyhoo, I decided that instead of looking for an end answer I would stick around for the ride.

Now this doesn't mean I'm just going to passively ride out the year. By no means. I will be an active participant but I'm only going to focus on the now. What's right in front of me. Consider two people in a car. They are both going to the same destination but one is in a massive rush. Always looking at his watch. Worried about what's going to happen when he gets to his destination. Once there, he's all frazeled and can't even focus. He's so stressed out he can't even appreciate anything. The other guy has been talking to the driver and asking about certain sites on the way. Looking at the different people he's passing. Appreciating the scenery. Once he arrives at his destination. It's just that! A destination! He got so much more from the ride that the destination isn't as important. Once there he can calmly take care of the task at hand.

I've decided to be the second guy. Life is too short to be so stressed. I have to give myself some time. Patience. Ha! Such a small word but it means so much in life. Til' next time.